


#23 "Love is stupid"

by Miracles_happen



Series: Drabbles :) [5]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Depression, Eddie's sad, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Needs A Hug, Insecurity, M/M, Men Crying, guess what?, ive accepted that im sad at this point, post 3x08
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-01
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:07:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21627328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miracles_happen/pseuds/Miracles_happen
Summary: Eddie opens up to Buck about his insecurities
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Series: Drabbles :) [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1558744
Comments: 4
Kudos: 114





	#23 "Love is stupid"

“Love is stupid,” Eddie whispered, barely audible over the shitty comedy playing on the TV. He heard Buck turn to look at him. They had a call today involving a woman committing suicide to get away from her husband. Eddie had been shook to his core by the events, and even though he tried his best to hide it, Buck had seen through it and offered to stay the night at Eddie’s house. They both had the day off the next day, and Eddie knew Christopher would be thrilled to have his Buck over. He had been ecstatic when Buck came over for dinner and was so happy up until he fell asleep between the two of them. As Eddie left to tuck Christopher into bed, Buck had cleaned up the popcorn and washed the dishes. When Eddie returned, Buck finished up and they resumed the movie. Which lead Eddie to his statement about love.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Buck asked softly. Eddie knew “it” was more than just what he said. Buck had undoubtedly picked up on Eddie’s bad mood over the past few weeks.   
“The woman today… she was going on about how she wasn’t good enough for her husband, and how it was better that she was dying and I…” Eddie felt a tear roll down his cheek, “I understood what she was saying.”

“Eddie…” Buck whispered softly, holding Eddie’s hand in his own. Under different circumstances, Eddie would’ve been flustered and not been able to function, but he was so far out of it that the action didn’t really occur to him.

“I mean, with everything that happened with Shannon, I--” Eddie’s voice broke, “I was just… I-I forgave her for… for everything, and… and it still… it still wasn’t enough. I-I was… i wasn’t enough.”

“Eddie,” Buck tried again, rubbing his thumb across Eddie’s hand reassuringly. Eddie tilted his head in Buck’s direction but wouldn’t meet his gaze. 

“And you… when you left… I was so scared that it… that it was happening again… and I… and I couldn’t stop… I couldn’t stop it. I knew that it… that it would hurt Chris… Christopher, and that it was… and that it was my fault because I pushed.. I pushed you away, and I… and I just… I just fucked up again, like I did with… with Shannon, but this time it was… it was so much worse, and I let you leave, and you weren’t.. And you weren’t coming back, and that just.. It scared the hell out of me, because I wasn’t enough to keep you--”

“Hey,” Buck interjected, grabbing Eddie’s face and forcing him to stare into his gorgeous blue eyes. “You are more than enough, Eddie. You did everything right, you tried so hard to get me to stay--”

“But it wasn’t enough--”

“But I was an asshole who didn’t realize what I had in front of me.” Buck wiped away the tears on Eddie’s cheeks as he continued,”There are people here in this world who care about you so much, who feel like they aren’t enough for you, the amazing Eddie Diaz. You are perfect just the way you are.”


End file.
